There seems to be a reoccurring theme happening here about Saturday's. We end up getting a short amount of time to our selves where we envision a bit of hanky panky and it doesn't go to plan?! Last weekend it was a toddler free night filled with junk food, Netflix and sleep in lieu of romping around this weekend it was an hour or so when one kid was asleep and the other on a walk with nana. It was all going smoothly you know like two kids sneaking around all excited and what not but then it took a turn for the worse involving me fumbling with a condom while Jared laughed hysterically at me and my awkward amateur birth control knowledge (it's been a while I've been in sole charge of this part ok guys!) it was a fucking disaster that ended with both of us giggling wondering why we even bothered when we should have just used the time wisely and slept, napping is serious business as parents and when the opportunity arises to sleep you sleep!
Oh but it gets better as Jared drifts off almost instantly the smaller child wakes up.
Just what I wanted did I mention she had woken four times the night before which is almost unheard of for her, I was a walking zombie before I even got out of bed at 6.30am. So she wakes and Jared's oblivious to the events that are unfolding in front of us even though I'm doing my best attempt to huff and stomp and accidentally pull the blankets off and move his pillow. Nothing not one eyelid was batted so I huffed right out of the room and slammed the door.
But he redeemed himself because on the weekends he takes the toddler out on some kind of boys date they normally hit the park or the mall if it's really hot (air conditioning Jared's scared of being outside if it's too hot because he goes really really dark lol) and just wander around but it almost always ends in icecream and Rocky knows it. I look forward to it all week after dealing with his two year old sass on the daily, I normally shove a boob in Ruby's mouth then chuck her into bed and eat chocolate or write a blog post but today I slept hali frekin luya. I hope these men dates happen until Rockys 18.
Moral of the story is don't try to have sex when you could sleep instead it's not worth it even if you do actually get the d into the v.
Happy Saturday may your vagina enjoy it more than mine did ✌🏼️