On Monday we went to a music class and well she was mainly music is that classed as a class? I used to take Rocky to shit all the time and he turned out great like really really great but Rubes, did she not stand a chance right from the start?! Oh god have I ruined here? Am I the reason she doesn’t speak, she hates almost everything apart from her Nana and Poppa and am I the reason she’s such a sassy little bitch?! (bitch in a good way like she will be a girl boss kind of bitch, so fuck off Grace) is it all because she doesn’t get taken to shit?

Rocky went to all the shit, like all the extra curriculum activities, fuck is that a thing at this age? Like are they called extra curriculum activities? I am asking a lot of questions here basically the reason I’m writing this is because I am a cunt of a parent and I need all you other parents that are just like me to be all yo B your all right like she probably would have been a sassy sausage even if you did take her to these things that good mum’s take their kids to. I mean it’s not that I don’t want to take her but she’s kid number two and that makes shit awkward like I now work, I have kid number one that needs to be taken to kindy etc. and needs train tacks built and also when Rocky was a babe I didn’t have Netflix so that’s another big factor (roll your eyes go on).

Any who the thing is on Monday I was at this music thing and Ruby was being sassy as shit demanding more crackers and not really being that into the whole music thing but we did this song where a puppet points out your body parts, yep I just realized how creepy that sounded but it’s not I swear like the kid puts this weird silicon lizard finger puppet on its finger then the songs like where’s your wrist wrist wrist, where’s your hip hip hip, ok so first thing I’m not sure if those are the actual words I don’t pay that much attention and it’s only our second time there so give a sister a break but you get the gist. Basically I realized that I’m a terrible parent and we never do shit like that you know the shit you do with your first kid but then kind of forget to do with your second kid, we don’t really count a whole heap or go over color’s or feelings or numbers you name it we probably don’t do it. Ok so I know what your all thinking sort your shit out girl but the thing is it’s probably too late so I’m kind of in the fuck it stage where they all catch up in the end?! Right? Also she’s the second kid so she probably already knows all this stuff but she doesn’t let on? I’m thinking Rocky holds these little classes with her when I’m not around and he’s legit teaching her shit because he realized that mum and dad are fucking useless ya no? Hmmm I made that up but it made me feel better, also this morning I asked her some things like where’s your … and your … and to be honest she surprised me like for someone who has had no effort put into her learning she’s fucking doing ok so she knew where her head, foot, puku and leg was she looked at me pretty clueless when I asked her where her arm was so I’m counting that as a parenting win, ok not a parenting win but a Ruby win. Also side note why are they teaching them heels and wrists in that song that made me feel like a terrible parent what happened to basic body parts, I guess they think us parents will naturally be teaching them at home huh?

The one thing I am bloody great at is reading to her, Ruby loves reading like she’s obsessed with it all she wants to do at preschool is read, all she wants to do at home is read and all she wants to do in her sleep is probably read. So my one claim to parenting fame is that I read to the baby girl a lot, so maybe she’s learning those important things I’m not actively teaching her juts through books? I’m a massive advocate for reading with babes right from birth they should be read to, so I guess don’t stress to much if they can’t count to ten at 18 months as long as you sit down and read with them whenever you get the chance.

I guess we are all doing our fucking best whether that’s counting, teaching languages, letting them watch the wiggles (they teach them a lot on the wiggles), learning body parts or feelings or whatever.

Yolo bitches, love your kid and nurture your kid and do your absolute best for your kid ok if you do that you will kill it mama’s.

B xx